shutterstock_269568806Of all the stress the holidays bring (family arguments, rude shoppers, screaming children), the biggest pain might be that one age-old dilemma: What should I buy for my wife.

It is not that you do not know her well. It simply seems that everything you have ever bought for her is met with a little disapproval, pained thanks or at best, moderate gratitude.

You want to wow her, but the gifts you got never seem to do the trick. In fact, a gift is a personal thing, and no one can tell you what to get her but her. However, many people can guide you on what NOT to get her. And that is a great place to begin.

Here are the gifts you should never get your wife for a holiday (Christmas, Hanukkah, birthday, Mother’s Day, etc.) – but be aware of one thing. If she drops a hint, or actually asks you to get any of the below, then all rules are off! Just make sure she is sincere!


Repeat after me: Lingerie is a gift for you. She might like it and feel nice in it, but at the end of the day, if you are in a monogamous, loving relationship, she wears that to feel sexy for you. Let HER buy it as a present for you!


You might be able to get away with accessories (pending the woman), but avoid buying dresses and even more so, pants/skirt for our wife. Not only is it a gamble over the style, but fit is key in fashion. If you want tot ake her out shopping and let her pick one, that is one thing, but do not buy her something she may or may not fit in to.


Valentine’s Day or not, candy is for kids and for couples that are not very creative. You can do better than a heart-shaped tin of chocolates anyone can get at a drug store. Now, if she has a favorite childhood candy, consider that, but do not get her general, run of the mill chocolates.

Gift cards

Do better. Be thoughtful. A gift card is great for kids and family members you do not know too well, but your wife deserves more thought and more understanding.


Everyone loves a nice candle, but everyone knows that they are the least thought out, least specific gift someone can give. Keep the candles for the acquaintances – your wife deserves better.

Soaps and lotions 

Like candles, these are general dollar store gifts that actually show no thought or intention.


Uh oh. Unless your wife is an aid (maybe professional) chef, do not assume she will love any kitchen gadget – especially one in which you will to get to sample its use. A gift does not and should not mean more work for your wife, in the kitchen or elsewhere.

Cleaning products 

Never, ever get your wife cleaning products or appliances. Cleaning up your house is not a privilege. It should be a shared responsibility. If you benefit from a gift to her, it is a terrible gift.


Colors, shades, brands and applications become very specific questions that most men cannot answer before purchasing makeup for their wives. Avoid the hassle and let her do it on her own. And be grateful you do not have to put in half the effort.


Many women love shoes, but they need to be the right fit and the also fit the personality of the wearer. Let you wife pick out shoes of her own, but never assume she will like any pair. It is way too personal.

Exercise equipment

The implications in buying your wife exercise equipment as a gift are tantamount to asking her for a divorce. Do not give her anything that implies she should be doing something or looking different. A gift should feel loving and thought out, not random or have ulterior motives.

Be kind, be thoughtful and ask her what she wants. That is the sign you show her you love her. Good luck gentleman, and happy holidays!